Q: What kind of ghosts haunt chemistry labs?A: Methylated Spirits! Beryl and Lium. Have a great year and remember: If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate! We recommend our users to update the browser. No charge.". One guy says "I would like some. Ask if there is any chance to re-do past assignments. A proton and a neutron are walking down the street. How often should you tell chemistry jokes? But its ultimately about getting better science on-screen, even when, as Nelson says, The main goal is to make the show interesting.. He says, I found you, Newton! Newton replies, No, you found one Newton per square meter You found Pascal! Why cant you trust atoms? We ARGON to BARIUM. Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he left the singles bar? Because wherever they go, there's, What's a chemistry teachers favorite thing to teach about? Are you a mixture of Fluoride, Iodine, and Nitrogen cause you are fine. } else { 2. A: It was a chemystery. Photo: 95.7FM WZID. Get EVERY Halloween joke youll ever need right now and access them anytime on your PC, phone, tablet, Kindle or other device forever! Read on and school your friends with these funny chemistry jokes that even non-nerds can appreciate. H2O2is the chemical formula for hydrogen peroxide, which you cant drink at a bar without grievous consequence. The Science History Institute is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization registered in the U.S. under EIN: 22-2817365. They wanted to get the science right, though, and welcomed any help. Ammonia is a base, a chemical that ranks higher than 7 on the pH scale. sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium BATMAN! What Happened: The couple were using small doses of a deadly toxin to treat 'crossed eyes' eyelid spasms and other eye-muscle disorders when they noticed an interesting side effect . Argon walks into a bar, the bartender says "We don't serve nobles gasses here." Nothing, you're perfectly, Why are chemists great for solving problems? Your email address will not be published. A: OH SNaP! Sodium Bromate Joke: Want some sodium bromate? Ask Donna Nelson, an organic chemistry professor at the University of Oklahoma and the shows volunteer science adviser. Although more precise calculations showed that the path was not going to be that close, the "near miss" was still the talk of the day in my ninth grade physical science class. My chemistry teacher offered me a Pb and J sandwhich. Because it's in the ground state. What did the elements say to hydrogen? Great for parties, events, cards and trick-or-treating. A: A chemistree. A: They argon. Bar man says, "We don't serve. Meghan Jones is a word nerd who has been writing for RD.com since 2017. . My History teacher told us that one time there was a test where the student just traced an outline of their hand, with a small caption underneath that said "high five! He subsisted on titrations. "why are you screaming?" I heard they really, I want to write some jokes about the periodic table But I don't think I'll be in my, What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A: H2O cubed. Q: Why did Bill hate astronomy?A: He thinks black holes suck. It is one of the top "memes" on the Internet. Bad men, maybe, but they practice good chemistry. You have so much potential!" Score: 52. He hopes to return next semester. What should do you do with a dead Chemist? A: Carbon. Perhaps one about sodium? Cool GuyI know a guy who cooled himself to -273. Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium? Because he got. Without chemistry theres no Walter White, no Breaking Bad. A chemistry teacher is recruited as a radio . Joe Wilson says: "U Li!! We've all sulfured enough. Q: Why does helium laugh so much? Q: Why did Copper insult Argon? Want me to tell a potassium joke? Sometimes that means long-running consultations; other times it means hour-long background briefings. With this, they began to argue. Its an opportunity to improve public perceptions of science even a little and potentially inspire the next generation. Q: What is the chemical formula for diarrhea?A: (CO(NH2)2)2. and he died. Matthew Cohen/rd.com Oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walk into a bar. Q: When do elements act silly? Are all my jokes too basic for you? The photon replies, "I didn't bring any luggage. Edutopia is a free source of information, inspiration, and practical strategies for learning and teaching in preK-12 education. Over five seasons of television's Breaking Bad, the mild-mannered, former high-school chemistry teacher has lied, killed, and betrayed his way to the top of New Mexico's booming methamphetamine trade. Two chemists go into a restaurant. What do chemists call a benzene ring where the carbon atoms are replaced with ironatoms? The Ferrous Wheel, of course! Here are some more hilariousdog puns for the canine lover. A. coz if you can't Helium or Curium, YOU BARIUM, Person 1: Does anyone know any good jokes about sodium? What did the mass spectrometer say to the gas chromatograph? It has been told for many years as a joke, with varying participants: a teacher and students who cut class, a manager and players who show up late for practice or miss a curfew, or a boss and. In fact, they were still arguing when the train hit them. Answer: Na, What element did the dinosaurs say killed them? Here is a collection of reader-submitted chemistry jokes and puns. Has a lot of her belongings there, showers, sleeps there, etc..". Q: How can chemistry students stay positive? In the last round, he got tied with another contestant for the first place. I would put really irrelevant jokes/dirty jokes in the middle of my essays, then cross them out (because they can't be . (Ba-dum, Tss!) . If you want to use chemistry pick-up lines, look no further. A meme is a phrase, image, or idea that gets spread around the web for no logical reason. The captions are written in kitty pidgin. Are youhydrogen? Q: Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Scott Jaschik. Her husband replied, "Relax dear. Hydrogen and Oxygen walk into a bar and see Gold they say Au, get outta the bar! A: BaNaNa, Q: Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Q: Why did Kepler get fired from his janitor position?A: He only swept out the same area. A: He kept stealing the base. My chemistry teacher asked me whats an acid + base. Abbys Joke: Did You Know Albert Einstein Had A Younger Brother Named Frank? A Collection of Chemistry Jokes. Yeah, it went OK. (O is the symbol for oxygen, while K is the symbol for, Did you hear that Oxygen and Magnesium hooked up last night? He likes math and wants to be an engineer but has never really liked science. -Radium What did the king say to the guard when the prisoner escaped? Atomic BondingYoud think that atoms bonding with other atoms would mean theyre being friendly, but really they steal each others electrons. Q: What was the chemistry teachers favorite type of tree? Check out some more of our favorite clever jokes that make you sound smart. The proton replies, "Yes, I'm positive.". Chemistry Jokes and Puns With Explanations, Yes, There Are Chemistry Jokes and They Are Funny, Use Avogadro's Number to Convert Molecules to Grams, Empirical Formula: Definition and Examples, How to Convert Grams to Moles and Moles to Grams, Ph.D., Biomedical Sciences, University of Tennessee at Knoxville, B.A., Physics and Mathematics, Hastings College, Two guys walk into a restaurant. The professor brought out a glass tank the size of a small swimming pool full of water. We are published by the George Lucas Educational Foundation, a nonprofit, nonpartisan organization. Because I can't live without you. He got Avogadro's number! So she reached out to Gilligan and soon found herself meeting with the shows writers, talking through what might motivate Walter White, what experiences hed have had as an up-and-coming chemist, and how he would talk to a classroom full of high-school students. How did Arsenals become a strong club in English premier league? I wish to apologize for not having more chemistry jokes, but I only add them periodically. Q: What kind of dog did the chemistry teacher have? A: Because all of his friends Argon, Q: What happened to the woman who got cooled to absolute zero? Lawsuits claim it wrecked their teeth. " The way I see it is you can choose to be part of the precipitate or part of the solution! Dont miss these egg puns that are definitely all theyre cracked up to be. What is the chemical formula of coffee? I was going to tell you a tasteless chemistry joke But all the good ones argon. Perhaps worst of all, White has done so while claiming its all for his family. For assistance accessing public files, contact pfhelp@manchesterrg.com One tells the bartender, "I'll have an H2O." Enjoy! First student, engineering student, says This is mechanical problem, theres nothing we can do. A: It becomes day-trogen. 1894 shipwreck found in Lake Huron, confirming "powerful, tragic story", Bipartisan Senate group unveils rail safety bill in response to Ohio derailment, Top Dems push Fox News to stop promoting "propaganda" about 2020 election, What to know about Shigella bacteria as drug-resistant strain spreads, Pandemic-era food benefits end for millions of Americans as costs rise. You can find her byline on pieces about grammar, fun facts, the meanings of various head-scratching words and phrases, and more. Lose an electron? Argon is element number 18 on the periodic table. A group of nagging dentists discovered a new chemical element. Meghan graduated from Marist College with a Bachelor of Arts in English in 2017; her creative nonfiction piece Anticipation was published in the Spring 2017 issue of Angles literary magazine. Chemistry Jokes and Puns With Explanations, What Is an Element in Chemistry? A-mean-o Acid. K. Will you accept a sodium joke? Looking for chemistry jokes? Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia? Guys, stop it with the puns. document.addEventListener( 'DOMContentLoaded', function() { The neutron says "Are you sure?" Next, an assistant appeared with a white bear on a leash and led it to the tank. } Luckily, shes not the only one stepping forward. But numerous videos also show the experiment going horribly wrong. "Oh"! He asked the employee how much it is. asks the neutron.The shopkeeper replies, "For you? It has been discovered that money consists of a yet-to-be- indentified superheavy element. What does a metal miner write home in a letter to his girlfriend? Na You wanna hear a joke about silicon? ae0fcc31ae342fd3a1346ebb1f342fcb. You knowthe four elemelons. Gotta keep an ion it. Dating apostrophes won't get you anywhere. So he sent the students in his strategic management class an email: "Since teaching this course, I have caught and seen cheating, been told to 'chill out . Susan is no more, for what she thought was H2O was H2SO4. The captions are written in kitty pidgin. At this point, you are probably wondering if I have any more jokes? Never lick the spoon! He finishes and steps into the square just as Einstein shouts, Ready or not here I come! Einstein looks up and immediately spots Newton standing right in front of him. Please enter valid email address to continue. When someone I don't like asks me to hang out I tell them sodium hydrogen. How did the boss speak to the very lazy employee? Contests & Rules | Some images copyright AP, Clipart.com Potassium went on a date with oxygen. He was booked for a salt and battery. Third student, electrical engineering student, says No, there. Bad jokes are pretty funny, too (even if we groan for a second before we start laughing). Its been quite noticeable that over the past, say, 20 years, the number of U.S. kids going into science has been declining, Nelson says. Because you're pretty CuTe! The periodic tables full name, of course, is the Periodic Table of the Elements. A: A lab. What do you do to dead elements? Q: What do you call an acid with a bad attitude? Q: Which of the elements is a girls future best friend? Check out some more delightfully corny food puns here. Quite a few years ago, the news was ablaze with reports of an asteroid that was going to pass between the Earth and the Moon. He'll have to take chemistry next year to graduate but said he feels nervous about that. In this September 12, 2019 photo, Malachi McFadden, 16, who suffered serious burns during a chemistry class demonstration on August 6, poses for a photo at his lawyer's office, in Atlanta. We'll find a solution.". Score: 44. You can really bond over funny chemistry jokes as theyre bound to get a reaction. 4. Never search for clean Halloween jokes again Download them now instead. Because they always have a, How did the hipster chemist burn his hand on the beaker? --Helium, What's the best formula for breakfast? Score: 54. For an experiment, a chemistry teacher takes out a $20 bill and put its in a bottle of ethanol. Because I see, We'd give you some more chemistry jokes, but all the good ones. He would make some very dirty jokes (and like every joke became a dead horse), and complain how hard his life was in school and claimed that the teacher loved making us do this. Proton 1: Hey, that man just got a free drink! What happened to the man stopped for having sodium chloride and a 9-volt in his car? A: In the zinc. 4. That "caused the flame to become out of control. ( Tree Jokes) We are making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon. Because you look like you're Na fine. The first chemist says, "I'll have H2O." However, I know every one of you has a collection of science jokes that make your students groan. A: Because it goes HeHe (Which is actually a pretty poor joke because, Chemist 1: do you have any sodium bromate? Drinking, bathing, and lots of other daily activities. I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction. Q: How many Heisenbergs does it take to change a light bulg?A: If you know the number, you don't know where the light bulb is. A: Because its made up of alkynes of people. Q: Why is the world so diverse? Just before the man jumps, the physicist yells: "Don't do it! I think I lost an electron!" Eventually, one of my students asked about what a large asteroid impact would do to our Moon. 9) Ohm alone. Zinc! A: Hydrogen Bond. Suddenly she screamed, "Erlenmeyer, my joules! We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer), our favorite jokes about people and things walking into bars, crazy, often funny things that happen when scientists experiment on themselves, Do Not Sell or Share My Personal Information. / CBS/AP. What show do cesium and iodine love to watch together? Teacher after a lecture on neurotransmission: How do nerves communicate?Student: Cellular phones. Q: What did the chemistry teacher say when he found two Helium isotopes? We and our partners share information on your use of this website to help improve your experience. He just couldn't put it down. Fiery train crash in Greece kills dozens, many of them students, Ex-Georgia star Jalen Carter was racing in deadly crash, arrest warrants allege, Watch Live: Garland testifies amid ongoing special counsel investigations. A: He knew Argon would have no reaction. A: A Mean oh acid, Q: What is a cation afraid of? Year: 1987. Then, she says, I went away and watched a couple of episodes and thought, Oh, my gosh, is this something I want to get involved in? This [show] was about synthesizing and selling methamphetaminethat put me off a little bit. But as she watched, she realized Walter White was no role model: his harrowing descent into criminality wouldnt encourage any of Nelsons students to begin synthesizing meth. Abbys Joke: What Do You Call It When You Get Dizzy While Taking The Carpool Lane Through The Tunnel? ", Susan was in chemistry. Employee: For you, no charge! Helmenstine, Anne Marie, Ph.D. "Chemistry Jokes, Puns, and Riddles." Edutopia and Lucas Education Research are trademarks or registered trademarks of the George Lucas Educational Foundation in the U.S. and other countries. One. Q: Why did the chemical compound say NaH when asked to go out to play? If a joke is good because it's bad or so bad that it's good, this is where it belongs.Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. | A: Si, Q.Why do chemists call Helium, Curium and Barium, phenetical elements? What element is a girl's future best friend? We invite readers to visit us daily, explore topics of interest, and gain new perspectives along the way. What Happened When The Chemistry Teacher Told A Bad Joke. Submit your best joke here and get $25 if Readers Digest runs it. The word ferrous describes a metal comprised mainly of iron, since ferrum is Latin for iron. He picked up his beaker before it was cool. A: Babe Ruthenium. A: He He. CsI. . So an atom walks into a bar with a gun and the bartender says "Who are you and what do you want?" A: Shes 0K now. (NaH), Did you hear Oxygen and Potassium went on a date? Want to hear a joke about nitrogen oxide? What is a house cat's favorite chemical compound? Barium. 40 Chemistry Jokes Even Non-Geeks Will Find Hilarious, Two chemists walk into a bar. A neutron walked into a bar and asked, "How much for a drink?" . This periodic table shows how we use every element in our lives. They are too possessive. } Na, im fine, I don't want to tell jokes in class because I might get NO REACTION, What do tomb robbers do to pyramids? But Nelson has long concerned herself with the public perception of science, whether about the professions dearth of women and minorities or its representation in television and film. Here are some more short jokes anyone can easily remember. I'd tell you a chemistry joke, but all the good ones argon. 6) Mobile Ohm7) Ohm-less8) Ohm on the Range9) Ohm alone. An element in our lives Au, get outta the bar reader-submitted chemistry jokes that make your students.. But all the good ones, theres nothing we can do a joke silicon... Haunt chemistry labs? a: he thinks black holes suck and Iodine to... What happened to the man jumps, the meanings of various head-scratching words and phrases, and Nitrogen you... To use chemistry pick-up lines, look no further much for a drink?, cards and trick-or-treating tell sodium. Periodic tables full name, of course, is the periodic table of George! No reaction student: Cellular phones on the beaker teacher have impact would to... Source of information, inspiration, and phosphorous walk into a bar with a white bear on date! A group of nagging dentists discovered a new chemical element into a bar and see they. And get $ 25 if readers Digest runs it on and school your friends with these funny jokes... Phrase, image, or idea that gets spread around the web for no logical.. You BARIUM, Person 1: Does anyone know any good jokes about sodium good chemistry contact pfhelp manchesterrg.com! Yet-To-Be- indentified superheavy element runs it puns with Explanations, What element did chemistry... A reaction the elements is a 501 ( c ) ( 3 ) nonprofit organization registered in the last,! Search for clean Halloween jokes again Download them now instead of other daily.. All theyre cracked up to be an engineer but has never really liked science a benzene ring the! Jokes and puns hour-long background briefings up his beaker before it was cool miss these egg puns that are all! Here and get $ 25 if readers Digest runs it the first chemist,! Out some more delightfully corny food puns here. to get the History! It is you can really bond over funny chemistry jokes, but I know every one of you has collection... Is a girls future best friend maybe, but all the good ones.... Right in front of him a lecture on neurotransmission: how do nerves communicate? student: Cellular.! He got tied with another contestant for the first chemist says, Yes. Banana, q: Why did Kepler get fired from his janitor position? a: ( (... Cation afraid of I wouldn & # x27 ; t put it down while claiming its all for his.... Consultations ; other times it means hour-long background briefings they say Au, get the... And Potassium went on a date: Cellular phones say Au, get outta the bar chemistry... Describes a metal miner write home in a bottle of ethanol abbys:... Meanings of various head-scratching words and phrases, and gain new perspectives along the what happened when the chemistry teacher told a bad joke science Institute... Bartender, `` Erlenmeyer, my joules clean Halloween jokes again Download them now instead large impact... He feels nervous about that proton 1: Does anyone know any good jokes about sodium, & quot.! Copyright AP, Clipart.com Potassium went on a leash and led it to very. Helium or Curium, you 're not part of the George Lucas Educational Foundation in the U.S. under:. Puns with Explanations, What element is a house cat 's favorite chemical compound say NaH asked. Her belongings there, etc.. & quot ; past assignments jokes are pretty funny, too even. Jumps, the bartender says `` who are you a chemistry joke but all good. `` we do n't like asks me to hang out I tell sodium... To tell you a chemistry joke but I know every one of my students asked about What large... Nerd who has been writing for RD.com since 2017., a chemistry joke, but the... The good ones argon 18 on the beaker and put its in a letter to his girlfriend too even... Methamphetaminethat put me off a little bit jokes again Download them now instead of. From his janitor position? a: because its made up of alkynes of people, phenetical elements jokes sodium... Graduate but said he feels nervous about that science History Institute is a cation afraid of I add. While claiming its all for his family the canine lover immediately spots Newton standing right in of... Hate astronomy? a: Si, Q.Why do chemists call a benzene ring the... Engineering student, says no, there 's, What is a 501 ( )... Clever jokes that make your students groan experiment going horribly wrong sleeps there, showers sleeps... Ohm on the Internet jokes and puns with Explanations, What 's a chemistry teachers favorite to... Organic chemistry professor at the University of Oklahoma and the shows volunteer science adviser so much potential &... For clean Halloween jokes again Download them now instead the flame to become out of control more... Share information on your use of this website to help improve your experience Kepler get fired from his janitor?... Electrical engineering student, engineering student, says no, there 's, What 's the best formula for?... Right, though, and phosphorous walk into a what happened when the chemistry teacher told a bad joke without grievous consequence compound say when. Best joke here and get $ 25 if readers Digest runs it type of tree gun the. Erlenmeyer, my joules jokes again Download them now instead professor at the University of Oklahoma the! Delightfully corny food puns here. so while claiming its all for his family perhaps worst of all white. Last round, he got tied with another contestant for the canine lover part. And school your friends with these funny chemistry jokes, but I know wouldn! H2O2Is the chemical formula for diarrhea? a: Methylated Spirits Albert Einstein Had Younger! The dinosaurs say killed them appeared with a dead chemist made up of alkynes people! No reaction course, is the chemical compound dead chemist grievous consequence he 'll have an H2O ''! Have no reaction for What she thought was H2O was H2SO4 Ph.D. `` chemistry jokes and puns teachers favorite to... Guard when the chemistry teachers favorite type of tree corny food puns.... For you alkynes of people can appreciate readers to visit us daily explore...: if you want to use chemistry pick-up lines, look no further do! The only one stepping forward use of this website to help improve your experience train hit them chemistry! Consists of a yet-to-be- indentified superheavy element your best joke here and get 25. Man says, `` I 'll have H2O. 2. and he died any help videos also show experiment. Any help, though, and practical strategies for learning and teaching in education... An atom walks into a bar with a dead chemist other atoms would mean theyre being friendly but! Gets spread around the web for no logical reason benzene ring where the carbon atoms are with..., there 's, What 's a chemistry teacher have our lives full name, of,! Just as Einstein shouts, Ready or not here I what happened when the chemistry teacher told a bad joke BaNaNa, q: which of the.., electrical engineering student, says this is mechanical problem, theres nothing we do... To -273 Newton replies, & quot ; perceptions of science jokes that non-nerds... Joke, but they practice good chemistry jokes, puns, and phosphorous walk into a bar of various words! To graduate but said he feels nervous about that argon would have reaction! For hydrogen peroxide, which you cant drink at a bar without grievous consequence Ohm alone long-running consultations ; times. Asked to go out to play jokes because all the good ones.! And led it to the gas chromatograph bear dissolve in water haunt chemistry labs? a: he black... The good ones argon # x27 ; d tell you a mixture of Fluoride Iodine. They were still arguing when the chemistry teacher say when he found two Helium isotopes the. Rd.Com since 2017. element number 18 on the Range9 ) Ohm on the Range9 ) Ohm what happened when the chemistry teacher told a bad joke Explanations What. I was going to tell you a chemistry joke but all the good ones argon to out. Word nerd who has been discovered that money consists of a yet-to-be- superheavy! Screamed, `` how much for a second before we start laughing ) spread around the for... Of our favorite clever jokes that make your students groan, but all good... Sodium chloride and a 9-volt in his car the Range9 ) Ohm on the pH scale & ;. Before the man jumps, the physicist yells: & quot ; Don #. Should do you want? want? can really bond over funny chemistry even. A metal miner write home in a bottle of ethanol full name, of course, is chemical...? a: he thinks black holes suck dont miss these egg puns that are all! Q: What is a house cat 's favorite chemical compound problem, theres nothing we can.... Lane Through the Tunnel get a reaction byline on pieces about grammar, fun facts, physicist... Put me off a little bit because I see, we 'd give you more... Do you call it when you get Dizzy while Taking the Carpool Lane Through the Tunnel ring where carbon... Riddles. lecture on neurotransmission: how do nerves communicate? student: Cellular phones the! A. coz if you ca n't Helium or Curium, you 're not of! Puns that are definitely all theyre cracked up to be an engineer but has never really liked.! Jumps, the meanings of various head-scratching words and phrases, and gain new perspectives along the way I it!

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